Saturday 16 July 2011

Amazon

I swear you could type in http://www.temptation.co.uk/ and you'd be directed to Amazon. Whoever designed Amazon is a genius. (I'll be back shortly. When I typed what I thought was a fictional web address in just above, it went all hyper-link on me and now I'm intrigued. And slightly worried. Ok, I'm back. It was just a list of links to other websites where you can buys cars and computers and whatnot. Now I'm relieved. And slightly disappointed.)

The second I log in to my Amazon account special magic happens. Now I know I'm apt to use the term magic quite often and quite loosely to cover all of the things in the world that I don't understand. Like aeroplanes, which are far too big and heavy to fly and seem to do so just because they want to if you ask me. And TV because, well just because I have no idea at all. Even when it's explained to me. In fact especially when it's explained to me. And basically all of technology. Let's just say I get how a water mill works and anything after that is sketchy.

Anyway, back to the point. Actual magic occurs when I go to Amazon because IT KNOWS WHAT I WANT. It has spent time, while I was away doing other mundane things, compiling a special list of all the books I've always needed (and some I didn't even know I needed but now realise that I really do), and is displaying them in neat rows for me to view in all their glory. Headings like 'New for you' and 'Inspired by your wishlist'  sit atop these rows of tempatation.

Ruth, (it knows my name. It likes to use it. It knows I'll buy more because it personalised this whole experience just for me) would you like the latest series of House? Yes. Yes, I would. Thanks for suggesting it Amazon.

Ruth, you really love your shiny new kindle, don't you? Wouldn't you like a lovely new cover for it? Doesn't it deserve one? Yes. Yes, it does. You're right Amazon. You're always right.

Now Amazon has me in its grasp, it's not letting go. It brings out the big guns:    

One click buying (Sub-text: Don't look at the price. Don't even think about it. None of that matters. It's so easy. You want it. Just do it!)

I'm helpless. Even though I know Amazon loves you just as much as it loves me. I know it knows your name too. I know it's spent time compiling a special list of all the things you need and yes, I know it gives you one click. But I can't help it. The hooks are in too deep. I've been tempted and I've given in.

But it's nice. And my kindle deserves it, right? I mean Amazon said so, so it has to be right. Come on, admit it - who's received an Amazon package in the last two weeks, or is expecting one right now? What did you get? :D

4 comments:

  1. Funny Blog! I loved it. It's me, K. I can't log in except under anonymous. Don't know why.

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  2. Thanks K. I'm really enjoying my blog this month :D

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  3. This could be me... I order from Amazon between fortnightly and monthly. Mainly books for me. But in the last four weeks I have bought a food mixer and an electric whisk, several songs for my ipod and a Wii game for my son. In fact I think, after that, I am due a book... or two.
    Amazon is my best friend.

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  4. Ah Red, you made it work!

    I get mostly books too. I got my hands on my lovely kindle cover this morning though. Oh Amazon ::sigh::

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Please prove you are a robot. I'll be disappointed if you aren't.